Polish your English with “The Master and Margarita”! Issue 28.

“— Фу ты, черт! — воскликнул редактор. — Ты знаешь, Иван, у меня сейчас едва удар от жары не сделался! Даже что-то вроде галлюцинации было… — он попытался усмехнуться, но в глазах его еще прыгала тревога, и руки дрожали.”

[AmB]
“What the devil!” exclaimed the editor. “You know, Ivan, I think I almost had a sunstroke just then! Maybe even something like a hallucination.” He tried to smile, but alarm still flickered in his eyes and his hands were shaking.

[AmG]
“What the devil!” the editor exclaimed. “You know, Ivan, I nearly had a heatstroke just now! There was even a kind of hallucination…” He tried to smile, but anxiety still flickered in his eyes, and his hands trembled.

[AmK]
‘What the devil!’ exclaimed the editor. ‘You know, Ivan, I nearly had a stroke just now from all this heat. Even something like a hallucination.’ Berlioz attempted a chuckle, but alarm still darted in his eyes and made his hands shake.

[AmP]
‘Pah, the devil!’ exclaimed the editor. ‘You know, Ivan, I nearly had heatstroke just now! There was even something like a hallucination…’ He attempted to smile, but alarm still jumped in his eyes and his hands trembled.

[BrA]
“Well I’ll be damned!” exclaimed the editor. “You know, Ivan, I almost had a seizure just now because of the heat! There was even something like a hallucination…” he tried to grin, but alarm was still dancing in his eyes and his hands were trembling.

[BrG]
‘The devil!’ exclaimed the editor. ‘D’you know, Ivan, the heat nearly gave me a stroke just then! I even saw something like a hallucination…’ He tried to smile but his eyes were still blinking with fear and his hands trembled.

[GT 2017-09-10]
— Fuck you, damn! Exclaimed the editor. «You know, Ivan, now I have hardly hit the heat!» Even something like a hallucination was … — he tried to grin, but in his eyes still jumped alarm, and his hands trembled.

Big Boris’ Commentary:

1. Observe the difference in the translation of “воскликнул редактор”. [AmG] wouldn’t pass TOEFL & Co. ;))
2. Observe the difference in the translation of “прыгала тревога”. [BrA] & [BrG] used Past Progressive, While the others preferred Past Simple. Try to explain this.
3. Observe the difference in the translation of “руки дрожали”. [AmB] & [BrA] used Past Progressive, while the others preferred Past Simple. Try to explain this.

Don’t hesitate to comment and propose your variants of translation!

Legend (“Am” = American English, “Br” = British English):

[AmB] — Burgin, O’Connor 1995
[AmG] — Ginsburg 1967
[AmI] — Itallie 1993 (Theatrical Adaptation)
[AmK] — Karpelson 2006
[AmP] — Pevear, Volokhonsky 1997
[BrA] — Aplin 2008
[BrG] — Glenny 1967
[GT] — Google Translate

© Big Boris 2005 – 2017

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